It’s time for garage sales, y’all! I am absolutely sick with excitement… or maybe it’s all the clearance Easter candy I ate. Either way, I wanted to celebrate my excitement by making some free garage sale flyers for my Momcasters! You are free to use any of these fun garage sale flyers for your sale so long as you promise to send me 14% of all your profits. (LOL.)
Print Your Free Garage Sale Flyers
Just click the photo of each flyer and a new page will open so that you can easily print it. 🙂
So, you’ve got to make your garage sale stand out from the rest, right? So print a few of these mustache discount flyers (write your address at the bottom), and plaster them all over the neighborhood.
The best things in life are … fun… and can be bought with a quarter on a Saturday morning around 8 AM.
Maybe you haven’t actually decided to sell a husband at your garage sale, but isn’t it at least worth putting it out there and seeing what kind of offers you get?
Y’all know kids’ clothes are a big garage sale item. But, in order for your kiddos’ clothes to be a must-have and nab top dollar, you should probably present them in a little nicer way than a hand-written sign in black marker on the back of a piece of cardboard. 🙂
Putting price tags on all your items has to be one of the biggest garage sale headaches. Seriously! It’s the worst! What makes it infinitely easier for you and for your shoppers is to color code your stickers with signs that spell out what each color “costs.” On this sign, you could (for example) write “.25” on the green space, and then everything that costs a quarter at your sale gets a green sticker or tag! Easy, right?
I hope you get some use from these free garage sale signs, y’all. I also hope you make a bundle at your sale! Meanwhile, are we Facebook friends? I’d love to meet you so come on over to Momcaster on Facebook and say hi!
Have mercy, y’all. Mother’s Day is almost here and if you’re like me, you’re wondering what to buy for your Mom. I’m a Mom myself (thus the name ‘Momcaster’) and I have decided that qualifies me to help answer the question – “what do I buy for my Mom?” Right off the bat I can tell you what not to buy for your Mom…
Anything that can be used to clean, cook, or do chores for other people. No! Just no!
What to Buy for Your Mom!
From Etsy shop SomethingAboutSilver, how much do you love these personalized rings you can buy for Mom? Simple, sweet, and completely lovely.
The Happiness Project is sweeping the nation like a consuming happy fire. If you’re not familiar, pop over to Happiness Project and get the story.
I’m crushing hard on this 18″ sterling silver necklace you can buy for your Mom. It reads “The Love Between A Mother and Daughter Is Complicated, Noisy, Tender, Strong, Affectionate, Funny and Forever.” Isn’t that a true sentiment every Mom & daughter will understand?
I am absolutely addicted to pretty notebooks. For me, there is almost nothing more wonderful than a new notebook full of blank pages and possibilities. If you add new pens to the mix, my eyes roll back in my head and I have a little joy-stroke. If your Mom is a person who is forever jotting things down, hook her up with these lovelies.
This monogrammed, fabric-covered and personalized notebook from Our Little Messes is just precious and it comes in lots of colors!
Sharpies are my drug. I’m serious. Would your Mom love you awful if you bought her this sweet pack of retractable Sharpie pens in assorted colors? Of course she would. She’d probably Sharpie you a sweet note to tell you so.
Click on to page 2 because there are lots more beautiful, fun things to buy your Mom to go!
I’ve decided that watch rings are the most awesome thing I’ve seen in at least 15 minutes. They are unique and fun and I want at least 7 of the most darling watch rings I can find to buy…. which is why this post is so cleverly titled…
7 of the Most Darling Watch Rings I Could Find on Amazon
I love to stay in exotic themed hotels. My tall traveling partner and committed sidekick (Tall Jerome) is as much into finding exotic strange or weird themed hotels in these United States as I am. Our theory is this: life is too short to miss all the weirdnessthe world has to offer. (I think that’s why we like each other so much.)
In fact, we appreciate three things above all else:
1. Route 44 Big Gulps of wine.
3. Exotic, strange & weird in all its forms.
To that end, I’ve been in search of the most wackadoo, exotic, strange and weird hotels in the US. Our plan is to stay at every single one of these themed hotels – stopping only to re-fill our wine tumblers.
Here they are, in a very particular order that only I will understand. That’s right. I’m bringing smart-ass back to blogging.
7 Strange, Weird & Exotic Themed Hotels You’ll Go Nuts For
1. Shady Dell in Bisbee, Arizona is a trailer park packed slam full of vintage trailers with no showers. Yep. You have to walk outside to get to the showers. It’s like camping, but without waking up covered in dew. Not for nothing, but what purpose does dew actually serve? And why don’t more people talk about the scourge that is dew? It’s like nature pees on everything – and it should be stopped.
So normally I like my themed hotels to have indoor plumbing. I’m picky like that. But, the idea of staying in this trailer park delights my heart in ways I cannot explain. It makes me want to wear an apron and beg Ricky to let me be in the show. (I Love Lucy reference absolutely free. You’re welcome.)
2. Treebones Resort in Big Sur, California is chock full of yurts. Did I know what a yurt was up until about 10 minutes ago? I did not. Wikipedia says a yurt is a portable, bent wood-framed dwelling structure traditionally used by Turkic nomads in the steppes of Central Asia.
Of course it is. Don’t be ridiculous, Wikipedia.
What I do know is that these appear to be exotic hotel awesome sauce and I want to sleep in one as soon as humanly possible.
3. Jules Undersea Lodge in Key Largo, Florida is a lodge… under the sea… in Florida. Where else can you spend the night that requires you to take a 3 hour diving course and in some cases, have a doctor’s release? (In other news, I was required to have both those things in order to marry my 2nd husband. Should have tipped me off.)
Talk about exotic hotel, kids. The use of the sweet phone this chick in the photo is talking on is a huge selling point for me.
“Me? Oh nothing. Just chillin’ 20,000 leagues under the sea and thought I’d catch up on my phone calls while my boyfriend reflects quietly on his decision to wear a genuinely embarrassing shirt on our vacation.”
OH MY GOOD LORD YOU CAN SLEEP INSIDE A GIANT DOG BODY! If anyone has ever uttered that sentence to you before in your life, you are a super cool person with interesting friends. Could this hotel be in any way more strange or weird? I submit that it could not.
There’s no phone (thank God I made my calls when I was sleeping with the fishes) and no television. But, there IS a clock radio and jigsaw puzzles, so yeah. I’m going to go to there.
5. Out “N” About Treehouse Treesort in Oregon first grabbed my attention not for its entirely exotic-alicious treehouses for grown ups, but for their awesome use of an “n” instead of “and” or even a sexy little ampersand in their name.
Bold choice, treehouse proprietors. Bold choice.
Because county officials felt these treehouses were not safe places for human people to sleep, they were ordered to shut down several times during an 8 year legal battle to get their permits. C’mon! You’re never gonna hear a Hilton admit to that. (Please insert obligatory Paris Hilton joke here.)
There are ziplines, and swinging bridges and a really detailed release and assumption of risk agreement guests have to sign before gettin’ their treehouse on. I want photographs of Sadie Sher and Tall Jerome signing said agreements so that people marvel at our bravery in perpetuity.
A sandbox for kids is one of life’s finer things as a child. When I was little, my MawMaw bought me a sandbox and it was awesome sauce. I must have spent hundreds of hours playing in that thing! It was kind of sandbox posh as it had a canopy and seats. I was the envy of all the kids who wished they could rock a sandbox like mine.
If you’re looking for a sandbox for kids, you’re doing good work in the whole parenting arena, by the way. I salute you.
While I myself am legally too old to have a sandbox of my own, I think my grandmonkeys would totally love one. Would my daughter, their Momma, be thrilled that I brought a sandbox over for the kids? She would not. But here’s the cool thing… I can do what I want because she’s not the boss of me.
Sandbox for Kids –13 Most Popular
These are the bestselling sandboxes as of March, 2013.
These are the bestselling sandbox toys as of March, 2013
Buy Sand for Kid’s Sandbox
If you give the kiddos a sandbox with no sand, it’s just a box. Everyone knows that’s no fun so DON’T FORGET THE SAND! 🙂
So there are the best-selling, most popular sandboxes for kids for 2013! Hope it makes your job of locating them a little easier. Meanwhile, be sure you like Momcaster on Facebook. I love making new pretend internet friends! 🙂
Even though Oprah didn’t tell me to, I went in search of shirts with animals on them. Why? Because the whole “shirts with animals on them” thing is a super hot, up and coming trend and I am nothing if not a trendy up and comer (no matter what my kids tell you).
1. I don’t know a lot about squirrels, but I do know they are dapper dressers. I can absolutely guarantee you won’t see a squirrel running around wearing a raggedy pair of sweats and a flannel shirt with mustard stains all over it. (Unless the squirrel is shopping at Walmart.)
2. I want to start a club called, “Awesome Individuals Who Wear Gorilla Cop T-shirts,” in which I, as founder (and president and sergeant-at-arms) I will require all members to purchase this t-shirt from lastearth. It delights me to know that when I wear this shirt to my cousin’s wedding no one else will have on the same thing.
If one of these fish was shown sporting a tiara made out of aluminum foil while eating peanut butter from a jar and ugly-crying, it would be called “One of These Fish Is Not Like the Others” and it would be awesome sauce.
It would also look exactly like me when I celebrate my weekly You May Have Gained 5 Pounds But At Least Your Not Deadday.
4. I can admit something to you because we’re pretend best blog friends – I don’t know what a Bali Koi is. Do you still like me?
Do I know what low impact dye is? I do not. Please don’t break up with me.
5. I want to buy ArtisanTees a pony for this ridiculously awesome Hipster Tiger t-shirt. Seriously. For those shoppers who suffer from a freak Q-tip accident that caused all their tiger knowledge to drip out of their ears, the shop owner shares the definition of a tiger.
“A Tiger is a big orange and black striped liony thing with sharp claws and rather a nasty bite. They don’t usually eat men but that’s only because they don’t usually get the chance. Obviously, if you live near a tiger it may consider eating you. Basically, what I am saying is – the further away you live from a tiger, the less chance you have of getting eaten by one.” (Urban Dictionary)
10. At first glance you may think this honey badger t-shirt from CrazyDogTshirts cares. Upon closer inspection however, you will realize that in fact NO… this honey badger t-shirt don’t care.
Hey Cute Reader! Do you have a topic you’d like me to cover? How about a sexy awesome something on the web you want me to see? Do tell. It’s easy and you’ll totally get good karma for sharing. Just click “contact”. (Note from the Momcaster Legal Department: Sadie has no authority to guarantee good karma. She’s full of crap. )
There I was, minding my own business, eating generic peanut butter and off-brand cinnamon graham crackers, when my ex-wife-in-law Suzanne texted me a picture of herself.
A short list of critically important things you need to know before we continue:
1. It was not a porny picture.
B. Suzanne’s legal name is Melissa, but nobody calls her that except for everyone she knows in the whole world other than me.
III. When I grow up to be a rich blogger, as God as my witness I will never eat questionable peanut butter again.
And now we return you to our regularly scheduled blog post.
So there I was, unable to whistle if my life depended upon it, staring at pictures of Suzanne’s (aka Melissa’s) left eyeball on my iPhone, and wondering if other ex-wife-in-laws text weird things like that. Obviously we need to have a very serious discussion about boundaries.
“I bought this skincare stuff called Nerium AD , even though I figured it would probably be a waste of money,” she said. Suzanne is widely known for sentences that end with, “…even though I figured it would probably be a waste of money.”
Conversely I am known for sentences that end with, “…and then I married him even though I hated the way he ate spaghetti and his Mom still clipped his toenails.”
“But it works!” she screamed in her text. I know she was screaming even though she didn’t use all caps because I’ve known her so long, I totally know when screaming is implied. “Seriously! I was expecting it NOT to work, but it has!”
Before I could respond, Suzanne sent me another picture. This is a shot of her giving me the stink eye.
“Suzanne, did you take the before pictures in an abandoned mine shaft?” I asked. “Because they are way darker than the after pictures.”
“No!!!!!!!” she responded with more exclamation points than anyone not on trial for their life should ever use. “I took them six days apart, same time of day so I’d have the same light, and I used the same camera and was in the same room. The lightness of my skin is part of what this stuff does.”
Listen Momcaster kids, I am a wicked skeptical person. I’m still not convinced my 1st husband was really even a legal man. But, I’ve known Suzanne since we met about eleven years ago at an ex-husband recycling and resale convention when she purchased one of mine. She always tells me the truth.
For example she shared with me that in fact no, Bruce Wayne is not a door to door mattress pad salesman who lives in South Dakota with his cat Mr. Sazzle Socks – no matter how legit his Match profile looks.
I asked Suzanne 3 really important questions about Nerium AD that perhaps you, Pretty Reader Person, might like to have answers for as well.
Q. What exactly has this Nerium stuff done for you?
A. It has evened out my skin tone making it seem lighter, my pores are smaller and the wrinkles by my eyes are almost gone. My sun damage is almost gone, too.
Q. Is it made from the souls of virgin kittens or manufactured by kidnapped Scientologists?
A. Really? You couldn’t manage even two perfectly normal questions?
Q. Will I have to sell my ovaries to purchase it?
A. You’ve already been through raging, hellish menopause so your ovaries are worthless. Everybody knows that. PS: maybe if you’d take that little tidbit off your own Match profile, men who think they are Bruce Wayne would stop asking you out.
Suzanne (or “Melissa” as her Mom and Dad and her birth certificate call her) recently made the decision to become a Nerium AD brand partner – which means she is selling this stuff now. While she has not paid me for this absolutely stellar piece of writing, FTC guidelines mandate I tell you she has bought me many pieces of sugary crack at the Cheesecake Factory over the years.
Meanwhile, I’m going to get some of this miracle skin cream that is totally not made from the souls of virgin kittens, take my own before and after photos and share them with you all here. Eventually. When I am brave enough to post before pictures of myself on the interwebs – which may actually be never. Totally depends on what my boyfriend, Mr. Patron, thinks I should do.
If you want to know more about Nerium AD, please visit Melissa Suzanne’s site and ask her as many questions as you want. Just don’t ask her about that one time she and I went to Kansas City and she freaked out about getting on the elevator. She’ll totally know that came from me.
PS: Wanna get a freebie from Suzanne? Enter the Rafflecopter contest below and if you’re randomly chosen, she’ll send you an awesome sample of Nerium AD.
I am moving in August. I love red. These two facts about Sadie the blogger become highly valuable information when NASA scientists begin trying to determine why I want to purchase red furniture at my earliest possible convenience.
Today, while the temperature outside is a lovely 172 Fahrenheit, I am sitting in a non-red chair and searching these interwebs for spicy hot things to put in the new place. Join me, won’t you?
This red chair with an ottoman (from Amazon) is plain and simple, just like me. (That’s a lie and I’m sorry. I haven’t been plain & simple since I was 8 minutes old.) Anywho, I like it because it’s inexpensive and it looks like I might sit in it and read a Hemingway novel.
I wouldn’t actually do that, but I like that people would see this chair and believe I would.
This red and cream chair delights me. I like anything with the word “cream” in it. In other news, I also like anything with the word “perfunctory” in it.
This is called a Hidden Treasures Storage Ottoman. I love it because it’s red and I love it because of the cool shape and detail. But if I’m being honest, I love it because I can store all my treasures in it and they will be, by definition, hidden.
If you come to my house, this is where my gold, jewels, crowns and rubles will be. Please be kind enough to pretend you don’t know.
I want this red kitchen cart from KitchenCarts.com because it makes me believe I will bake apple pies for John Boy and Half Pint.
I deeply, deeply desire these red leather bar stools from Home Element. If I had them, I would sit in them and drink martinis and feel exceptionally fancy.
This red leather sectional sofa is so delicious, I want to sprinkle it with cinnamon and eat it. I need this.
Are you listening to me, Oh Great Keeper of Red Leather Sectional Sofas?
So do ya love it? Are you a red furniture fan? Can we be best red furniture friends forever? 🙂 Come hang out with me on Facebook and we can talk about it.
Lowlights and highlights are a way to have your hair colored that makes it look “alive”, in my opinion. Instead of one flat color, you have different tones and shades that go together beautifully. Because it’s what I do, I’ve scoured the internet in search of the very best photos and examples of lowlights and highlights and I’m sharing with you!
If you love these, you should show these images to your hair goddess and tell her to make it happen!
This is an older photo of Miley Cyrus… before she started crawling up on poles and smoking Brussels sprouts. I like her hair color here. Very nice, Smiley. Now put your clothes back on and apologize to your Mother.
Eva Mendes has the best hair, doesn’t she? I’m convinced if my hair color was exactly like hers, she and I would be twins. Naturally.
This next photo features seriously pretty hair color, does it not? I’d love to credit the source, but between you and me, I found it on a big old spammy site and I’m so not sending you there.
Meanwhile, why don’t my lips look like this? Makes me want to smooch a bee.
Jennifer Aniston was sent from a far away planet to Earth to represent for our culture what perfect hair looks like. I wonder if she ever wakes up in the morning and screams at the cats, “I swear on all that is HOLY, I am going to shave my head and start from scratch!” I think she has the ideal mix of highlights and lowlights because it just looks so incredibly natural.
PS: I’m still mad at Angelina Jolie-Pitt and if I ever see her in Target, I’m going to give her such a look!
Us Magazine says this photo of Jessica Simpson’s hair is actually a wig. I’m okay with that because I love the multi-layered colors and I think she actually looks adorkable with short hair.
Meanwhile I’m sure Ms. Simpson will be relieved to know I approve. The Momcaster stamp of approval is highly sought after in the celebrity community.
Valerie Bertinelli is precious, isn’t she? How could Eddie Van Halen have been such a dweeb to her? This is a great example of lowlights and highlights that can cover up some gray that might be making an appearance as we get older.
Moroccan style is so beautiful and colorful. No wonder it’s popping up everywhere.
Moroccan Style, You Rock the Casbah
I want to sit in this room and look pretty. I want people I went to high school with to see me sitting in this Moroccan style room, and I want them to be so jealous.
They’ll be all, “Wow, you really did well for yourself.” And I’ll be all, “Oh this old room? It’s nothing. I only sit in it when I don’t care how I look.” (Or something like that.)
I’m a terrible cook because I was raised Southern. That means I only know how to fry things and roll them in sugar. Once my gallbladder had to die for my addiction to sugar-glazed pork rinds, I really haven’t been too much in the kitchen.
Meanwhile if I had this Moroccan style kitchen, I would totally try and be Sally Cooking Pants again. It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve seen in the last 4 minutes.
Don’t you look at these doors and want to know what’s behind them? I do. But then again, I’m always curious like that.
I would rock at that show… with the doors… you know… the one where you pick a door and dress up like Asian Elvis??
Meanwhile, aren’t these beautiful? I mean honestly! I don’t know what the hell they are but I want to own them all. Are they Morrocan shoes? They look like a cross between Toms and Crocs. This photograph is so pretty… I love the colors.
These Moroccan bracelets are darling, are they not? You should know I never use the word darling – never. Maybe that’s why I have such a long list of ex-husbands.
In an unrelated story, I definitely use the word “jerk face.”
via Ana Osgood Jewelry
Okay so I could sit here all night posting Moroccan things that I’m in love with, but I’m a busy woman with an entire box of Black Box Merlot sitting in my kitchen that’s not going to pop its own spout.
I’m so glad you stopped by! Keep coming back, sister! Rock the Casbah!